Wednesday, May 6, 2009


I'd like to retract yesterday's later post.

It's not because there is anything wrong with it. It's good to study God's word and wonder what He meant, and to ask Him what He meant. Pondering these things is fine.

My issue with what I brought up is this- it's not the point. And oh how easy it is to get caught up in the things that are not the point! It's so easy to get excited and interested in the things that we don't understand, the supernatural things that only God can do. That's part of what should be drawing people to the faith that we have. If we are living our lives in the way that we claim then this will be obvious.

That means we will have His love for others, and most importantly a supernatural love for HIM. I don't know about you, but it is hard to figure out how to love God. I just can't do it. There is nothing lacking in how wonderful He is and amazing and worthy of so much more than the love of mere me, that isn't my issue. It's that He is SO far beyond me that I have always had a hard time really believing that He loves me and wants my love. Obedience is not an issue, at least not the desire to obey. (I can't always obey due to know...being human and all.)

That's part of the awesomeness that God has been doing in my life right now. He has stepped in and begun to help me love HIM more. To understand that He loves me. And to find balance in that, because sometimes I think it's hard to balance knowing that He loves me so much but at the same time having the reverence for Him that He deserves too. Now that is supernatural. I teeter back and forth way too much and it's like I am bobbling in this little path carved by a jolly little stream. I hit both sides all the time, but the barrier is there and keeps me in check so that I don't go way too far off to the side.

Praise be to Him for that. Doesn't that in itself show His love?

So, my point is this. It's okay to wonder and think, but it's not my job to understand the things of God all the way. There are things that should make me look at my life and wonder what needs to be changed. There are many other cool things that God reveals to us. BUT- why do I always want more? It's like, He reveals...but then I take that in a little and want to move on. I can't help it because God is so exciting to learn about, His ways are so different! But I don't even have close to a grasp on the first steps before I want to move on. I just want to take in so much. That might be part of why He only gives us what we have. Why He keeps secret things just for Himself. I'm okay with that, I just have to remember that.

So the important things are to love Him above all else. That means more than anything on this earth...and anyone. And don't get all weird about that. If we are doing that right then we will end up loving our family and even beyond more than we ever could without loving Him most. Yes, I want to love Christ more than I love my husband. Yep, want to love Him more than my kids. Am I there yet... I have to be honest with you and say we are still in process there. But I desire it. That's a step in the right direction.

Next at the top is to love the rest of the world. That one is harder. Isn't it great that we have the Spirit of God though! Seriously! Because if I can't love God, who is perfect and amazing and wonderful, who is so great to me and loves me...well, then how could I love the rest of you? And how could you love imperfect, sometimes grumpy, often in the wrong even when I don't know it (...or sometimes even do) me? That's not normal folks. That takes someone special.



Jenilee said...

you are so funny and I love your hunger for the word of God. have I said that we'd make great real life friends? :) we can't always understand God's Word but it is our desire as Christians to know more, grow more and learn more daily. Keep up the good work!

I'm sure there is so much more to our prayers than we can know. More we can do or say or believe on our part but also the bigger picture that God can see that we don't see. We may not see healing but God sees everything and knows what is right and best. I often wonder how much he protects us from - the cold that could have turned to something more - yet stayed a cold because of prayer... that kind of thing. Prayer is an amazing gift so we have to keep asking, keep believing and keep trusting.

And, keep studying the word and learning! that is how we grow and mature in our walk with Him.

Becca said...

I love this - you're so right that it's so easy to get caught up in stuff that doesnt even matter :-) keep studying and digging!