Sometimes a Mom needs a woman like herself to talk to. A person who is in the throws of child-rearing and has similar situations to her own. I don't exactly have that person at this point, but I hope I meet her.
Sometimes you need a person to spill your moments with who will understand that that doesn't mean you don't have things under control and you are about to fly off the deep end. Someone who understands that the day was all wonderful until that moment (and it can happen in an instant) when everybody needs something all at once and you have three to four screaming bodies that need you and you suddenly revert to the age range that your children fall within and you get the urge to just drop everything, sit on the floor, and sink your teeth into one of them as deeply as you can because you are SO. DONE. and you just want them to stop screaming so you can think long enough to decide who the heck has the highest priority need at the moment...and then the waters are suddenly smooth all over again and tranquility reigns. But. Most people don't understand that.
Because there are moments of chaos- I'm in over my head. I have too many little kids. Or I am doing a great job "under the circumstances". Or, "It gets better than this, I promise."
I don't know that it will get better than this. How can it get better than this? I love this, even if this has moments of intense craziness where I feel like I am literally going to explode if they don't stop...I don't want it to change. And while there are people that understand that I'm not going crazy, and people that get how fun and also insane my life can be, I still sometimes need someone that I can tell about a situation that can say, "I KNOW! Seriously! The other day..." And perhaps that someone can help me to refrain from loosing all sanity someday and becoming like the little people that I spend all your time with...and giving a big hard bite to one of them*.
So for now, know that there are moments of craziness, but they are just that. Moments. The rest of the time we have a lot of fun. And those crazy moments sure are intense.
*I did not bite one of my children. However, the feelings of wanting to bite someone or something HAVE come to me before.
Also, for those that might have thought that Gumby's fat lip happened because I dropped her out of my arms, I'm sorry for writing that unclearly. I was holding her hand and she slipped out as she was falling because suddenly there was her entire body's weight resting in one of my hands and I didn't have a solid grip on her hand.
1 month ago