So, it is morning time. My children are in bed sleeping and I am quietly drinking my warm cup of coffee. Today the LORD roused me a bit later than yesterday. Yesterday I asked, "Are YOU serious LORD? You want me to get up this early? Surely the baby just needed to eat extra early and I can go back to bed for a little while..." But He said that indeed He wanted me to stay up and have time with Him. And I did.
Yesterday the He gave me some great words. He told me some very important things that included a call that is very long term. One of my lifelong callings. You know, the kind of mission that the LORD gives you that will not be finished in a year or even five, a mission that you are to walk out for an extended period of time... Anyway, it was a morning that left me thanking Him for the very early wakening and I almost felt as though I would have liked more time. Not because there was more to hear, more to do. Just because it's nice to sit out in the quiet with Him longer sometimes.
But I know myself. I know that I do not like to keep up with getting up in the early morning even though I know why it is the best time of day to do it for me.
And I am going to take a second here to explain that because I used to think it was just some rule that someone added saying that you should start your day with the LORD because your day will go better. Now, that might be true sometimes, but getting up in the morning to spend time with Him is not something you should do. Should is a word that means something is done out of the wrong heart. Should will get in the way of you growing a deep love for the LORD every single time, so please do right by yourself and God by letting go of every single should that you have regarding Him. Trust me, if you seek Him then He will bring you back to most of those "should"s later, but your heart will be right about it. And as I was saying, your day will often go well if you spend time with Him in the morning, but that's not why I think it's important. For one thing, that has a ME attitude. It is about what God can do for me...and that's not what it is about. Have you ever noticed how your mind is more in tune with spiritual things at night when you sleep? There is a lot of "noise" in your life that can drown out the things of God, the things of spiritual nature. At night, things slow down and you are not on hyper-stimulus mode, this opens up some room for your ears to actually hear what is going on in the spiritual. So, in the morning, I find that I am more open and can hear God more clearly because I'm more "clear". The waters of my mind and spirit are clear and calm, ready for God to make the first waves. And then...well, then those waves are what directs the rest of the day. Does that make sense?
Okay, so back to the fact that I have shown myself to be lazy sometimes...today it was an hour later than yesterday when I woke. I looked at the clock and said, "Are you serious LORD?! That can't possibly be enough time!" HA! Isn't that just like a human being too? We aren't happy with anything =) So, I got up and made my coffee and started praying over the time we were about to have together and I asked God to give me a stronger love for Him. I said something about having a taste of great hunger for Him and how I know that it is easy for that to dissipate and asked Him to grow that hunger for Him ten-fold. Strangely, He stopped me. I felt a disconnect in the prayer and I'm not sure if that makes sense to you, but I knew He wasn't pleased with that.
"WHAT?! LORD, what can be wrong with that? What don't you like there? I am asking you to grow my love for you...I don't understand."
You know what He said? He said, you are thinking in thoughts that are focused on YOU. He then said, "Out of commitment, real love grows." (Yes, I see how that sounds Yoda-ish...talk to God about that, not me.) He said that love is a choice, which I know. Then he quickened my heart to think of Ana as an example. We did not have true love for her before we met her, and even after we brought her home we were still in the beginning stages of love with her. We made a commitment to be her parents before we loved her and we acted out that commitment, but love didn't come right away. I guess love did come right away because love was that act. Love was being what she needed before we felt connected with her. Love was action based on choice, not feelings. And then the feelings came. And feelings that grow out of an uncomfortable act are very deep.
Just remember, if you make a choice to love God, don't do it because you should.
1 month ago